February 2023


Meeting Date

February 4, 2023

Reporter’s Name

Sarah UmmYusuf

Attending Admins

Amira, Sarah

Homeschool 101:

Concerns & Fears

  • Finding community
  • Are we robbing kids of that experience?
  • Especially younger kids

Advice:

  • “Exceptional people are built in solitude” – Naval Ravikant (https://youtu.be/fKca5JPPHpU)
  • Find groups/co-ops on website
  • Early Years centres, but check schedule bec they now bring in “drag shows”!

Topic:

Taking Back the Rainbow - How to Navigate the topic of Gender and Sexual identity in Islam

Speaker:

Sr. Tasneem Ghauri

Meeting Notes:

“Taking back the rainbow”
Begin with series of verses to frame the topic of gender and sexuality
  • Surah yasin (created in pairs)
  • Dhariyat (pairs of all things)
  • An-Nisa (created from single soul and mate, countless men and women)
  • Al-Imran (male is not like female)
  • Al-Layl (one who created male and female)
  • Yasin (similar thing to ride in)
  • Furqan (own desires as their god)
  • Ahzab (Allah decreed matter, no other opinion)
  • Fatir (evil doing made appealing to them)
  • Baqarah (hate something but it’s good for you)
  • Nisa (don’t crave what some have over others; ask for Allah’s bounties)
The ONLY way to frame is to begin with Allah’s words
Or you will get lost in circles
Begin with what you believe about Allah
If not, you’ll find terms like justice, authenticity, freedom, equality, etc. and not know how to respond
We also have questions too! What are our gender roles? Maybe we have misconceptions ourselves: what is a man/woman? What is masculine/feminine? How close/far is that from what Allah has designed or Prophet has explained in sunnah?
Must establish a strong reference point; like tawaf at hajj (God is at the centre)
Agenda is very aggressive and purposeful, so you MUST have a strong reference point and educate yourself about: who is Allah, how does He decide/create/function? Make that solid with yourself and with your kids. What system did He design for us, what does He value? What does He want us to sanctify and honour?
What is the aim of the shariah?
  • Preservation of religion
  • Preservation of life
  • Preservation of lineage (know who your parents, father is; inheritance)
  • Preservation of property
  • Preservation of intellect (intoxicants, etc)
  • Preservation of honour
Last sermon contains ALL of these things, codified in Prophet’s last khutba
In this talk, we’re focusing mainly on lineage (also honour)
  • Begin by defining terms, ask child what they think and then bring it back to what it actually means
  • We don’t believe in “your truth” and “you do you”. There’s an ultimate truth, regardless of what you believe to be true — must hold fast to this as a Muslim
  • One of the names of Quran is Bayyinah – establishes clearly what is right and what is wrong; without this clarity then you end up with ridiculous things like “I identify as a cat”
  • Right and wrong is not a human construct Bec we’re constantly evolving/changing, so we’re not capable to decide right/wrong by ourselves
  • Terms you’ll hear in discussion and will have to define yourself first:
    • Identity, what do you identify as, framed as expression of your sexuality, do we define or is it defined for us? My identity is in how close/far I am in my submission to Allah; shariah does not define us according to our actions, but by our submission to Allah; not reduced to ONE aspect of who we are; current discourse has done exactly that and this is how they frame it: my sexuality/gender is my identity. Shariah protects our role as human beings here on earth
    • Islam/Muslim, submission; I have intellect/reason but will never match Allah so I submit
    • Purpose as a woman/man and how close/far I am from what Allah decided is my purpose
    • Truth – what is truth, how do you decide what it is, how do you define it
    • Equity and equality
    • Freedom? How do we frame according to Allah, as believers our ultimate freedom is in our submission to Allah; free to do what we’re designed to do – worship Allah
    • Limits – what are they? Who decides, how do we define
    • Autonomy – “I get to decide” authority over the self, if that’s what you believe then do what you want. But as believers we believe that Allah has all authority over us (no mistakes, not for fun, with purpose).
    • Exceptions to the rule, exceptions don’t make the rule. 2 biological sexes exist and shariah/fiqh address that, but that’s the exception, diff things will be looked at and they’ll be encouraged to accept one over the other, but it’s not the norm
  • Our own gender is an expression of some of the attributes of Allah (mercy-mother; power, etc)
  • We don’t have “binary” in Islam; according to shariah and Allah’s words (created in pairs, part of the same thing, compliment each other, created from one being, supporters of each other), this is how we express who God is here on earth, part of honouring Allah, nafsin wahida > then duality; men can be feminine and women can be masculine, so we’re not completely distinct/separate from each other – like 2 pairs of socks for example, one cannot exist/function without the other
  • More than 69 different genders that people can identify as!!
MUST define all of these terms first before having the conversation (based in Quran and sunnah)
Family unit is sacred in islam – Sex has been split from reproduction (birth control, freedom of choice, abortion, same sex, etc) so anything that threatens to destroy the family unit is prohibited in islam, and what maintains this unit is permitted in islam
11:30 – Sharing and Q+A
How do we explain the rainbow to kids?
  • Define terms for yourself first
  • Explain the ultimate truth, then share the reality of what people are doing
  • Being aware of what ppl think/believe of the rainbow
  • Don’t try to reclaim it Bec then you play their game by their rules
How to respond to Queer Muslim groups who justify – Unfortunately in today’s world anyone can get up and say anything on a platform, but they’re not experts, they haven’t studied the entirety of the deen/shariah/fiqh etc. so their views aren’t based in truth
Allah only guides/misguides according to what’s fundamentally in your heart…if you truly want something that’s wrong from the bottom of your heart, Allah will guide you to it! And opposite is the same.

Resources:

  • Yaqeen Institute lots of good papers by Ust. Faatimah Knight abd Dr. Carl Sharif al-Tubgui
  • Study the Seerah
  • Names/attributes of Allah
  • 1989 book – After the Ball: How America Will Conquer Its Fear and Hatred of Gays in the ’90s by Marshall Kirk and Hunter Madsen (marketing exec and neuropsychologist) – really shows their whole game plan and we can see it unfolding today
  • MCNA presentation Grades 1-4
  • Proud to Be a Muslim presentation by Sr. Tasneem Ghauri

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